Lines of Logic

As I prepare for The Event That Shall Not Be Named, I've been re-reading Lots Of Smart People, including External Examiner's numerous books on North Country.

As a result of this reading, I have come to the obvious conclusion:

After all of my reading and writing and thinking over these years, I know nothing. Nothing about the Good Book (either half). Or The Best Man Ever. Or North Country.

This, of course, leads to the obvious corollary: Since I know nothing, therefore, I have not contributed anything new to the world of knowledge.

And this leads to the inevitable conclusion: Therefore, I will not be granted my Ph.D.

On the other hand, someone once told me, "You're granted your Ph.D. when you're utterly convinced that you know nothing."

If this is true, then perhaps, I can still hold out a wee bit of hope that I'll be granted my Ph.D. after all...